We are at one of life’s intersections, waiting for the walk signal. A green light. A push into the street. Something, anything, to tell us whether to turn left, turn right, or keep going straight.
I have always gotten a signal.
And I have always trusted the signal. When it tells me to turn, I do. Even if I lack all the information I’d like about where I’m going or what will happen.
But that was before. That was when it was just me. Or me and my husband.
It’s not as easy to step out into the unknown with children, is it? It’s complicated now.
I have bravely uprooted my life several times without much care. Without much analysis. It felt right. It always worked out.
But now, when I step into the unknown, I’m dragging my children into that intersection too. What if they’re scared? What if they don’t like the direction we’re headed? What if it’s a mistake? What if where we go is worse than where we’re leaving?
What if we fail?
So we went to the beach, seeking wisdom in the waves. Seeking a signal.
I have always gotten a signal.
It’s always been in the most unexpected of ways. So I don’t know why this time, I waited for the proverbial clouds to part and for God to just give it to me straight – preferably backed up by an angel chorus and a fabulous light show.
I planted myself on the beach, with my feet as deep in the sand as the anxiety surrounding me.
I watched and waited for the signal. I stared up and down the beach. I listened. I daydreamed.
Then, I watch Boy Wonder spend an hour boogie boarding in the surf. He looks like a happy dolphin in his wet suit. The water has always been his element – since he was first put in a pool at 6 weeks of age and he stopped his colicky screaming.
And I am taken aback by how fearlessly he rushes headfirst into the waves, mouth open and smiling. He waits for a big one, lays on his board and pops right over the crest until he finds the best one to ride into shore.
He doesn’t wait.
He doesn’t turn sideways to soften the blow of the crashing water on his face.
He doesn’t ponder.
He doesn’t shut his mouth to keep the salt out.
He feels.
And he goes.
The next morning, my bookworm, Little CEO, is sitting on the couch. She has just finished reading The Lorax out loud to her brother. I sit down next to her.
Mommy, will you read this book to me? she says.
She hands me Oh, The Places You’ll Go, a book I’ve not read aloud in many, many years.
I begin reading.
And when things start to happen, don’t worry. Don’t stew. Just go right along. You’ll start happening too.
My husband looks at me, wide-eyed.
I keep reading.
You will come to a place where the streets are not marked. Some windows are lighted. But mostly they’re darked. A place you could sprain both your elbow and chin! Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in? How much can you lose? How much can you win?
I look up at my husband. We speak without words.
You can get so confused that you’ll start in to race down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space, headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.
The Waiting Place…for people just waiting….
No! That’s not for you!
Somehow you’ll escape all that waiting and staying. You’ll find the bright places where Boom Bands are playing…
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So…get on your way!
I close the book.
A tear rolls down my face.
I look at my husband again.
He knows.
It is our children who will push us into the intersection, not the other way around.
They are not the complication. They are the signal.
We are leaving our Waiting Place.
We will rush headfirst into waves like Boy Wonder.
Today is our day.
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{ 47 comments… read them below or add one }
oh, my friend…I cannot read that story without tearing up. And it sounds like you read it at the perfect time. And you are right: they are not at all the complication. They are the everything.
Wishing you nothing but good things out of the Waiting Place.
xo
What a powerful post! I hope you can look forward with excitement now instead of anxiety. Best of luck!
It’s morphed into…anxious excitement, if that makes any sense?
Just what I needed to hear. Thank you for being so open and real with your feelings. We are in the middle of an intersection. We have started to turn and we know it is the right way… it’s just we have really slow car.
I GET the slow car. We’ve been trying to turn for two years.
Part of the reason I love visiting here is that I always feel that I take something away, whether it’s a great tip or a smile from a funny story. Today, I have chills, and a profound sense of gratitude that I stopped by here today.
Good luck moving forward; your family is clearly your center, and that will never steer you in the wrong direction.
Thank you for your kind words, Angela! I’m glad you liked the post.
And this is what keeps me coming back for more. I LOVE this.
I needed to hear it, too. I wait for signs of my own. I think today, you and your family were mine.
Best of luck to all of us stepping off the curb.
I’m so glad that it resonated with you….and best of luck.
xoxo
Great post you mentioned very well in this post if you are driving car then many signals will come on the road and you will need to wait to cross them until it will not green, so life is also some depend on signals like your own internal feelings if you are feeling well from inside then you will do any work easily and enjoyable.
Many times a question comes regularly in my mind what you will do when any signal will not working and i was asked this question from one of my nearest friend and then he said you should wait and look all around yourself and after that you if you feel yes now i can cross this signal safely they you should go.
Wow! Whatbwonderful post! I lve that you are moving forward.
Thank you! it’s exciting and scary.
Wow Gigi, what a sign!!!!
Much love and luck to you as you go forward on a new adventure.
wow. amazing how things are put into place w/ a Dr. Seuss book… that guy was a genius!
i hope that things continue to move smoothly for you. can’t wait to hear more about it
I have chills- and so many of them!
I adore that book and its messages? Are loud and clear, aren’t they?
I love the way you turned the messages and signals on their heads and wow! I cannot wait to read about where your adventure takes you!
what’s funny is that I didn’t actually get the picture of my kids dragging me into the intersection until i was almost finished with the post. and then when I thought about it..it was so obvious!
I adore this. And you. You guys are giving your children a gift. And it sounds like vice versa as well. Can’t wait to see all the places you go!
Wow, Gigi. I’m most amazed by the way yu and your husband felt the moment synchronously. Time to jump.
Like listening to the still small voice …
That book is Chelsea’s favorite, I have read it, I have sung it, I have much of it memorised … and good words for you to live by.
I look forward to reading the pages of your next chapter, but lovely words this morning Gigi, and goosebumps, yes, goosebumps.
Amen sister! Thanks for the reminder. It’s not always about what’s up ahead but what’s right ouside the car window.
that was so perfect in so many ways that I can’t stop the tears.
What a gorgeous way to look at Parenting
Cheers to you, and the courage it takes to go.
Thanks, kitch!!!
Sometimes the angel chorus singing is not quite the way we expected. So glad you got it though.
Those intersections are tough. No doubt.
We are working through a move or don’t move decision now and it feels so much more difficult with our children involved. I want to keep their world stagnant because I somehow think that’s what is best for them. I think they are definitely stronger than I give them credit for….and maybe the changes are the best things for them.
Good luck with all your decisions!
yes…so true that we want to keep their lives consistent but they are so incredibly resilient and wise…they inspire me!!! Good luck with your decisions as well. We’re right there with you!
Oh Geeg…
I was tearing up with you.
Yes! Yes! Leap!
I am so happy for you, and I’m so glad you are tuned in to everything that the universe can tell you.
This is wonderful, Gigi, to hear your joy and excitement.
I can’t wait for your family to start their new life.
Thanks, friend. Look forward to meeting you in a few days.
This is so beautifully written. It’s amazing where you can find clarification, answers, and inspiration if you are open to it.
I’m glad you got your signal and wish you much luck in your adventure!
I loved this post. The writing, the metaphor, the message…
But now I’m jumping up and down inside my skin thinking this: “WHAT ARE THEY DOING? WHERE IS SHE GOING?!!!”
I want to vicariously experience this with you.
I’ve lived within 30 miles of the same location for 42 years
(this is both a fact AND a metaphor. so, tricky.)
Take me with you! (metaphorically. or blogospherically. or whatever.)
And also hooray for your whole family!
Make your lives extraordinary!
(I know. Dead Poet’s Society said that already. But it’s true.)
So XO big time. And congratulations.
And be brave. Deep breaths.
Beautiful post. I’m glad you know what you need to do. I love that Dr. Seuss book.
Ummmm, chills, goosebumps, hair standing up on end … all of the above. Thanks so much for sharing, your story couldn’t have come in more perfect timing for me. My husband and I have also been standing at an intersection for a couple of years and every time we step off the curb, we tend to jump right back. But the familiar streets are not going to take us where we want to go. I wish you and your family well on your new adventure … whatever it may be.
This was so sweet to read, Gigi! I know this is a bittersweet time for you. Texas will miss you! So glad there are computers where you are going.
I don’t know what the hell is going on, but this is very exciting. And Dr. Seuss is WISE. It always pays to listen to the Doc. And our kids, of course.
Glad the anxiety has been lifted despite lack of light show.
all i can say is beautiful..hugs
Well shit. I’m with julie c gardner up there, I want to know what’s up! I’m so excited for you. And for the kids. As one who moved a lot, I now know the moves were done for us. To better Momma’s life (college) so that she could better provide for us. Incredible strength indeed. Good luck girl!
Sometimes children’s strength surprises us all. Whatever the big move is, figuratively or literally, good luck! And enjoy the adventure with your children!
These are the kinds of signals I love. And they’re the kind I usually get – they come to me in stories or music or a quote I’ve heard before and happen to hear again at just the right time, when I can actually pay attention to it. I don’t get the clouds and the light shows, but I almost think these are more powerful because this kind of signal is clearly coming to YOU. And how perfect that it’s your children that bring it. Mine does that too.
Totally excited for you.
What a great, great signal you got! Actually, 2 signals. Go for it, whatever it is. I can’t wait to hear about your next phase.
Beautiful. These are the posts that I love, love, love. The sweet moments of realization. Thank you for sharing such a positive, encouraging piece of your life, Gigi.
Chills, Gigi! Just lovely.
This is amazing. Are we going to be losing you?
Oh, the Places You’ll Go is my all time favorite kids’ book. I’ve been reading it to them since they were tiny infants. Love it.
We talk now and them about moving to NC to be near my husband’s family, as they are the more communal and “family-ish” family than mine is. We truly love being with them and hate living so far away from them. But my husband seems to be waiting for something to tell us to go, like job popping up or something profound, when sometimes it’s the little signs that are important, like how much we ached when they left after a visit, or seeing how much our kids truly loved being around their grandma. I hope you find what you’re seeking, but we’ll be sad to see you leave us here in ATX.
Wow what a powerful post! I think you have your ‘sign’…good luck to you and your family
Well, I’d say you get your ‘signal!’
Very powerful post. I got a little choked up reading it because I’ve been there at an intersection in life, stuck and not really knowing which way to go. And I’ve already learned so much from my daughter. I hope when the next new opportunity arises for me, I won’t let fear of the unknown stop me from pursuing it simply because I have someone else to think about now. She’s so fearless in everything she does – why can’t I be, too?
Beautiful!!!
Well, you may not have had an angel chorus, but I think the signal was loud and clear!!!
I am truly amazed at how much our children teach us!
Wow. What wonderful words of encouragement.